I won my first court case ever the other day. Didn’t have to say a word to the judge either. But it does stand as my most significant example of wasted time ever.
First, some background (partially edited from the MADDSKILLZ Update from August 2010):
Not exactly.
Fourth of July. I had just touched down in LA the night before. Willie had dropped me off at CVS so I could grab some essentials. I grabbed what I needed, along with these salsa verde Doritos that you can’t get on the East side of things.
Much better than Salsa Roja.
Since Willie wasn’t back yet, I took the opportunity to walk around and explore Highland Park on my own for the first time. This was not the best decision in the world. What made it ominous was the fact that through the cross-country flight my cell network got all mixed up, so I wasn’t receiving calls. Calls that Willie might have been making. I wandered my way onto the Highland Park Gold Line platform.
So Inviting.
Keep in mind, I just wanted to see the map that was at the station, and I happened to be eating those Doritos. They were good. What wasn’t good was when these two deputies came out of nowhere to flank me while I was looking at the map! I wasn’t planning on getting on a train, but they still were hell-bent on catching me for something. They started asking all of these questions!
Common sense goes a long way.
You have ID? Any warrants? What’s your address? Did you see the sign saying no food? It’s a $250 fine! I went from having a casual conversation to realizing that I wasn’t in Philly anymore.
Or Kansas, for that matter.
Next thing I know, I’m signing to show up in court in Pasadena!!! I was “lucky” that I only got one citation for fare evasion, instead of a second for eating on the platform. They saw my PA ID, knowing that I didn’t even know I was in a restricted area, so of course they just tell me that I’ll be fine as long as I show up in court. Welcome to LA: Mr. Can’t-Get-Right strikes again! Less than 24 hours in LA, and I run into police trouble for the first time since I stole that beef jerky from Pathmark in 2002! It must be the snacks. I took my sorry face back home, and luckily Willie was driving up. Freaking out because he couldn’t contact me, and I didn’t help matters by waving a ticket in the air! We laughed it off, but the only thing wacker than this was the fact that I never saw another cop stop me or anyone else to check for fare!
Good, you are all caught up. Now, the court date was scheduled for the day after Labor Day, but I had a huge teacher orientation meeting with my new team. So I had three options:
A) Miss the orientation to go to court.
B) Pay the fine online and go to the orientation.
C) Postpone the court date another TWO MONTHS.
Based on the fact that this is being written in December, you would be correct if you chose option C. I was not trying to miss a teacher orientation day, yet I also was not willing to pay for a stupid mistake. Time > money, and I was already wasting my damn time. I should at least get my money’s worth, and in this case, it meant keeping my money.
So fast forward to November. The Monday before Veterans Day, I showed up to Pasadena expecting to resolve the case. I got up early, prepared myself with all of my evidence (RE: Union Station ticket stubs and e-mail confirmations from Southwest Airlines) and arrived in Pasadena ready.
But I obviously had never been in court before. As soon as I found the place, I saw people just lined up around the corner of the building. But I was still optimistic. I even appreciated the metal detectors I had to go through, I was ready to go. But then I got to the window, and it was this clerk with the equivalent of crazy straws for nails.
How can you "handle" business with nails like these.
I knew that this woman wasn’t going to solve anything, but I still pleaded my case to her as if she was Judge Judy: “This ticket is dumb! I wasn’t even trying to get on the train! Can you tell the judge that for me?” I would say her hands were tied, but you don’t need the aggravation, so once again, I was faced with three options:
A) Plead guilty and pay the $180 fine and be done with it (which meant my first mark on my permanent record, oh snap).
B) Plead not guilty and get a court date in March 2011 (which would be a ridiculous eight months after the original event, hell no).
C) Plead not guilty, post bail, and get a trial set for December.
I thought about it… for about five seconds. I put that money up for bail. The way I understood it, if I paid up, then went to court sooner, one of two things could happen. Either officer dude shows up AND I do a terrible job with my case and the judge finds me “guilty”, but they would already have my money and it would be case closed and behind me going into the new year. OR, officer dude doesn’t show up and/or officer dude lets the judge know that this whole thing is quite excessive, judge agrees, and I could expect to get my money back in March (a time where I could probably appreciate free money in the mail). I was in a sour mood the rest of the week. So sour that I decided I should just cut my part of the rent and bills that week AND buy a ticket to Philadelphia (more on that when I feel like it).
So Thursday, I returned to court. My trial wasn’t scheduled until 10am, but I wanted to get there early, so I was in the building by 8:30. I sat myself down between these two ladies with parking violations after finding out who the bailiff was. Judge walked out, and the cases went by quick. I just chilled out, wishing I could listen to my music but not missing my phone much. After all, it was T-Mobile’s inconsistent network that got me in trouble in the first place (that, and my nomadic tendencies, I roam like a cell phone…never mind). When the judge went to recess, it was already 10:30. I was wondering when I’d get out, and how I would defend my ignorance and stupidity, and if I would even bother saying “Your Honor”. But, my name was called and the bailiff let me know that since my officer didn’t show up, my case was dismissed. I just had to fill out a change of address form and then I was free to go! Of course, I won’t see that money in my mailbox until March. Damn it. So in the end, the entire episode cost me nothing except the time it took to get in a jam and back out of it. Maybe now, I can enjoy those Doritos…
Unacceptable.
-1SKILLZ
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